Monday, May 5, 2014

Blessings for a Working Mother

I dropped my sweet thing off at Nana's and he cried as I left.  It is especially hard on a Wednesday, because that's one of my 2 job days (leave one job to head to an evening shift at my second).  I was frustrated that I had to leave him and posted the following on my Facebook page:

       Say what you will about women's rights and feminism....but when I leave my baby with him
       crying "Mommy!" solidifies that Mommies were not meant to be in the workplace.

It was supposed to be an innocent comment expressing my frustration for having to work when I want to be home with my little man.   I should have known better.  The remainder of the day was filled with debate on women's rights, parenting, and people likely frowning at their computers or smart phones wondering why Nicole hates working mothers and thinks they are terrible parents for working to feed their families.

Here's the thing....I don't really care if you work.  It doesn't offend me.  I don't even care if you choose to work, even if you don't have to (unless it takes priority over your family).  I know that many people are BETTER parents because they get out of the house, and go to work, and spend time with big people.
But the issue is this....I want to be home.  I feel like God calls me to be home.  And, instead, I work 2 jobs.  And even when I'm at the point where I'm not going to be working 2 jobs, I don't see a time when I will be strictly a stay-at-home-mom.  And that frustrates me.  I often feel that I am failing myself, as well as my child, when I can't do what I feel that I am meant to do.

That being said, I do believe that there are ways God uses working moms to enrich our families.  What it all boils down to, is how God uses you as a mother, working or not.  I believe a mom that chooses to work needs to know this.  And, I believe a mom that works because she has to, and aches to be home needs to know it as well.

Here are some great benefits specific to our family.

  • He is spending lots of quality time with his grandparents (something I never did and feel that I missed out on).
  • I am not constantly stressed about money (or....let's say I'm less stressed about money).
  • I don't find myself on kid burnout (a very easy place to end up).
  • The things that happen at work give me things to talk about with my husband (other than lunch menus and potty habits).
  • The things that happen at work make me especially happy to see my sweet kid at the end of the day.
  • Perhaps, one day,  he will look back and understand that sometimes we have to do things we don't want to do.
  • Perhaps, one day, he will look back and know that it's possible to follow your dreams, even if they are realized late in life, and even if it takes longer than you'd want.
  • It is teaching me to seek out what God wants, rather than what I want (very very slowly), and hopefully, in turn, it will teach my son that as well.
  • It is teaching me to be patient.
  • It is teaching me to rely on God.
  • It has taught me that other people can add to my son's life, enriching it in ways I could never do on my own.
  • It makes me really DESIRE to be home with my child.  So once I have that pleasure, I hope I won't take it for granted.

So while I still WANT to be home and I'm still insanely jealous of you mothers that get to do so, I'll try to focus on the positives and let God work the rest out.


  1. I love what you said about how God uses you as mother, working or not. I think that is so true. No one else can do the job of being the mom to your son.

  2. I too long to spend more time with my little boy! I'm on my way to that goal. Having clear intentions and expressing your desire, along with practicing gratefulness will go a long way toward making it happen! You have a great attitude.